An Assortment of Stories

Hello Journal 2

Damion's Journal

Hello Journal again

So I’m a woman, based on drunk woman that has a thing for me had to say about the little girl/parasite that wants to bear apples with me and things of that nature. She talks about me a lot. Little girl gone. Good she needed to leave before I had to throw her to the rabid direr badgers and their evil god Took took to stop their blood lust.

Journal do you think the weirdos think weird. I do. O journal what am I to do? The Crazy drunk lady says my salt is for sex and say I have relationships with horses on a physical level. BUT This is not the case! Never would I. I know you would journal but You’re dirty, and I am pure. That salt keeps me that way because mother said so. “Keeps meat fresh” she would say. So since I am what the lady’s back home said “a nice piece of meat” i figured if I have salt I will stay fresh.

well setting up camp, I see a tree where I can protect everyone while we rest, that’s a good idea don’t you think Journal? No Journal your wrong I will protect these people! I won’t get money if I don’t then I can’t buy you a new face. gah journal your so inconsiderate.

Camp Night/ starry / dark/ unpleasant

They are making fun of me again journal! this time they said I had no manhood I had to show them what a MANHOOD is. They must be unsure what males look like even though wierdy I keeps walking around naked holding his after he saw mine.

OW! that wench hit me with a rock trying to knock me out so she could rape me! It must be because of my Manhood! I warned her not too throw it because i didn’t wanna have to climb the tree again. Journal I had to stab her with an arrow! O that’s what the guy said in that bar when I was 12 “You gotta stab girls with your shaft for them to really like it” So I DID I stabed her with my arrow shaft to get her to like me so she wouldn’t knock me outta the tree but then she tried to KILL ME. Journal WHAT IS GOING ON. Orcy stopped me from having to kill her because I think she drunk the blood of a raging rabid Direr buffalo or something. She cut the tree down. That was a good bed. But Orcy made it OK. I couldn’t understand anything he was saying but i just nodded my head and wanted to make Angry dire drunk/lady/mean stop bleeding. Because bleeding women tend to yell much more mother would always say then those that don’t bleed. So I gave a potion of healing to Orcy to give to Bleeding lady/ I think here name is FRUNN- JAhh/ as a way of saying sorry I made you bleed. She has a horrible way of courtship. Even cats don’t scream that much. Went to bed in the undergrowth a few clicks from main camp. Weirdo II and weirdo II came with me and watched me go to bed and then to sleep. Good way of not having to take watch. Now to close eye, watch them Journal.

Day Bright/little cloudy / with no clouds

OOOO journal

Apparently Weirdy I and weirdy II enjoy watching me. They are blueish. I think they would look good if Orcy was smushed into them making a blue green thing that would be the ultimate creature. That could fetch so much coin! I’d be rich enough to buy out a higher portion of the guild . Now that’s what im talking about…..

So we reach the village and I’m writing into you now because the smell these farmers have. It isn’t pleasant at all and I’m not going to pay attention because they are not going to burn the bandits in the big house where we could put all the crops buried beneath the soil so they wouldn’t burn.

K I’m gonna look around for tracks….. I’ll talk to you in a bit journal.

routes, pathways, and trails with marks detailing exact routes to the village are scribed in meticulous fashion throughout the next few pages

K Journal almost back to the town, OH gods how tired I’m getting. Hopefully by this time all the farmers will have fallen asleep and I can finally find myself some beets. See Journal beets contain the essence of the falcon demon Mooshi Mookie’s children in it and when you drink enough of it you can develop a resistance to evil creatures named Willowscabbers. I know you hate beet juice Journal but after a while you don’t mind the taste.

ANY way I did find some particular footprints in the northern side of the town that are show indications of boot inlay of leather with buckle fasteners, and with a distinct pattern that would one could reason they where trying to be a bit secretive. And sense I didn’t see many trade routes that way I can only speculate that this may be bandit scouts heading from the foot hills.

written in big bold font


ooo I feel so giggly now, I wonder what the others are doing. I don’t think Orcy will want to hunt them down cause it might mess up his shirt. And weirdy I and weirdy II might be more Weirdy then normal and try to be like " Hmm I wonder what these people do…har har har I’m blue" Maybe Angry Girl/ FREE JAHHH would like to cut there heads off with me, but journal you know its OK because we will get paid to do it so it must be OK……… OK?

Looks like somethings going on in the town…….I’m so tired why is there fire and why does Orcy have a hat and why there light…. Journal I’m going in!


paintedbear DougPeters

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